My husband and I were talking the other night about holidays and how stressful they are to relationships. That got us on the track on whether or not a person should break up with their girlfriend or boyfriend before or after the holiday if they know beforehand it just isn’t going to last. So I am curious to know what everyone else thinks.

I think that the break up should happen before the holiday. Let’s assume, since it is so close to Valentine’s Day, that you were going to break up with your girlfriend and Valentine’s Day is just a week away. Everything she does lately is grating on your last nerve and you just want out. Yet you care for her enough as a person to want to spare her the humiliation of being broke up with right before Valentine’s Day.

Then a week after Valentine’s Day you break up with her. She is most likely now thinking that you only stuck around to get a gift. Even worse she may have been thinking that you were the one for her, her one true soul mate. She may have thought she would be receiving an engagement ring on Valentine’s Day. Obviously you had no such thoughts, but she may think that you just wanted to wait and make another day special.

But if the break up occurs before the holiday she has time to make other plans. Sure is going to be spitting mad, but she will in time realize that it was for the best She can make plans to go out with friends, or even put together an Anti-Valentine’s Day party.

Now what happens when it is the girl doing the breaking up? If she waits until after Valentine’s Day most guys would automatically think she did it to get the gift. With a guy doing the break up there is a lot of room for speculation. Quite the double standard, but there it is.

I know for me, I would much rather have the bad news before the holiday. But I have always been the type of girl to think, “If he doesn’t want to be with me, then I don’t need him.” Unfortunately I have seen way too many girls that do not have that belief, those are the ones that I think would really have a problem with being broken up with that close to a holiday. I don’t know, what do you guys think?

never ever ever break up with a dude/chick b4 a holiday....

Does this defining silence mean nothing to no one but me?

I agree. It's never wise to break up with that special someone around the holiday season. If you break up before, all their hard work can go wasted if they planned something special. Planning to break up after, well, you might feel guilty and feel forced to stay in the relationship.

The best thing to do is to wait until things are perfect for the relationship to be ended, rather than being greedy and not respecting other people's feelings.

well it really depends on the situation. if you thin you really want to break up and you are sure about that , you just have to know the situation if it will be better for your partner to know the truth as early as possible.

I agree with indieover, it's always best to end it as soon as possible if you think it won't work out. If you stay in too longer when you don't have the same feelings, you'll most likely end up getting in it deeper and hurting the other person more

well yes, people always think that the more they keep it secret their true feelings the more it will be better. but i think most people will just be happy to know the truth than to continue to live in a lie and pretensions.

if ya reali love that person i dont think u should every break up with them

oh wow. this is a tough questions. there are advantages and disadvantages for every decision. but in my case, i think it would be better if it is after a holiday because i am a very emotional person. i will just cry and cry during the holidays if that were the case.

ha! you are so right. if there is love abounding in the relationship, why break up. and why continue anyway when there is no love? but if necessary, i want the break up after. waaa

well i think we should try to save the relationship as much as possible. but still it depends on the person he or she really wants to fight for his or her relationship or not.